STI testing is the bedrock of a sustainable sex life, for everyone and especially for happily slutty adults. Most STIs today are easily identified and cured or treated. However, without easy access to testing and early detection, STIs can have devastating life consequences. Stigma, discrimination, fear, and lack of financial investment in preventive sexual healthcare all contribute to more difficulty accessing testing. Madame X, a career-long nurse, joins us to discuss her experiences and perspectives on STIs. In her teens, Madame X contracted chlamydia. Without access to testing, she ended up finding out about the disease only after it had progressed to the point of needing hospitalization and causing irreparable damage to her reproductive organs. Although information about and access to testing has improved over the years, today Madame X continues to see barriers to STI testing both in her personal and professional experience.